Pattern Release—Fallen Embers Hat

Most release days I know exactly what to say. I’ve been practicing the bubbly chatter and the rattling off of all the pattern details for a while now. A lot of times it’s all rehearsed and planned out weeks in advance. This time I haven’t planned anything, and the bubbles aren’t working today.

Of course, that’s partly due to the fact that this design took me more or less totally by surprise. As I posted last week, I sat on this yarn for a long time before inspiration struck; when it did, we were off to the races. The knitting, the write-up, the editing and testing, have pretty much happened at tornado speed. Somehow a clean, concise pattern came out. I promise.

Really, though, I think the mental block is due to the place this pattern came from. Everything I design is personal at some level, whether it’s for a friend’s wedding or based on my surroundings, or simply an expression of a mood or an aesthetic that I love.

But Fallen Embers is different. I’ve never designed something that was so directly an expression of my own life experiences before. Last week, I mentioned that I loved the song Fallen Embers by Enya as a teenager. In a way this design is a fusion of past me and current me—the me that loved the song without really thinking I’d ever go through the emotions in it, and the me that looks back on her past self and, at times, wants to go back there. I’m a nostalgic type. I’ve also always cared about the “rightness” of things; about things being the way they ought to be, or at least the best they can be. Life isn’t like that, apparently, which is why people write songs like Fallen Embers. And, just as importantly, why other people want to listen to them.

All that’s to say, I love this design. A lot. Maybe it’s the whole rose-colored spectacles thing, the situation where the editor says to kill your darlings and you can’t because it’s too personal, even if it’s bad writing to leave it in. I hope it isn’t, though. You’ll have to let me know what you think. All this isn’t to guilt you into buying it, really. (That was a joke! I just made a joke! Maybe the bubbles are coming back after all.) But if you want to know the details, here they are:

This pattern is out now on Ravelry and Payhip; you can get 10% off at checkout with the code ENYA until midnight EST on Saturday, February 5. If you’re a newsletter subscriber, check your inbox before buying, since there’s a special code in there for you.

I haven’t quite made up my mind how I feel about this business of ultra-personal designing. A part of my thinks it’s a bit tacky. I don’t know. It’s kind of funny, after all my soul-searching, that this design is a hat; I almost never wear hats. Maybe I should start, though.